WINDY SPIRIT, CALM SOUL

so i'm actually going. wow. i don't know how often (if at all) i will be able to update this blog for the next little while. but i will return june 20.

God has shown me so very much this past week - mostly about my own sinfulness - that i had to walk home from church today. it was really windy, but i'm glad for it. 'cuz somewhere in the wind, i was able to hear my thoughts and God's responses better. He reminded me that He had purposed me for all that happens in my life and He reminded me that above all else that may happen in the world, He loves me beyond compare. so it is with a peace and calm that i sleep now and joy will fill me tomorrow (perhaps not so much when i wake up at 4am... but who knows? ;p )...

Dear God, please bless the friends i leave behind. they have been so good to me. i pray that in six weeks, when i return, we will have God-stories to share about how You've shown Your glory in our small lives on both sides of this planet. in Jesus' sweet name i pray. Amen.

Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel...
~Ephesians 6:19~

SAY WHAT?

while my mom and i were driving today, her cell phone rang. since she was driving, i answered it. i heard a voice and then i heard something very faint. since i thought the reception was bad, i just kept saying, "hello? hello?..." not hearing anything, i repeated it again. after about 20 seconds of this, i realized i was talking to a child and she was saying something to me. her mom had put her on the phone to say thank you to my mom for sending her a birthday present! and i had just rudely interrupted her numerous times!

after the phone call, i reflected on how that's just like how i am with God a lot of the time. He's trying to say something to me while i just keep blabbing on and on because i can't hear His voice. and i get indignant because i don't seem to get a response! anywho, that was just a "poke" from God today. ;p

on a side note, if anyone's an earlybird and is crazy enough to come see me off, my flight out on monday is at 7:25am. so i'll be at terminal 3 at 5:30am! honestly, i don't expect anyone 'cuz if i wasn't the one flying, i wouldn't be there either! hahaha...

After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.
~1 Kings 19:12-13~

...

packing, packing, packing... don't really want to. but i know i have to... don't know where to begin. hm, maybe doing the laundry would be a good start? ;p never thought i'd have so many mixed feelings and at such intensity. i wonder if this is a common thing for people to experience before leaving on a missions trip? ...dunno. anywho, not much to write today. just one thing that's stuck in my mind for almost a week now. in Chariots of Fire, Eric Liddel explains:

God made me for a purpose - to go to China. But God also made me fast... When I run, I feel His pleasure. Not to run would be to hold Him in contempt.

when i use my hands to make something beautiful, i feel His pleasure. and i pray i don't hold Him in contempt.

"Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those who are with them."
And Elisha prayed, "O LORD , open his eyes so he may see." Then the LORD opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.
~2 Kings 6:16-17~