WHY

this morning, i woke up asking myself, "why am i doing this again? why am i packing my bags and moving away from all i've grown up with only to go to a place that makes me uncomfortable, a place so foreign to what i'm used to? why am i tearing my heart to pieces? what is it that drives me to go through this again?"

and in the stillness came the words For Christ's love compels us... just how does this love compel me? surely it is not only a force from behind me - that as i gaze at the cross of Christ, i recognize all that He's done for me and so, out of gratitude i go in obedience. that seems so... almost like a business transaction.

looking deeper, i realize the compelling force of Christ's love is what lays ahead. that Christ stands in front of me, offering me hope and peace and a depth of love i have yet to fully know. and THAT is what compels me. like a child learning to walk, i see the Father beckoning me, arms open wide as i totter in my little steps of faith, always moving forward however hesitantly. why? because i know there's a heart of Love before me. and i know He's there, waiting to enfold me in the warmest embrace i've ever known.

If we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.
~1 Corinthians 5:13-15~

THANK GOD FOR DIRTY DISHES

Thank God for dirty dishes
They have a tale to tell
While other folks go hungry
We do so very well
With home and health and happiness
We shouldn't want to fuss
For by this stack of evidence
God's very good to us!
--seen at a friend's house

Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
~Ephesians 5:19-20~

SECRET HEROES

for almost as long as i can remember, i have loved language. that a bunch of sounds strung together with pauses in the right places can be heard and understood as a series of ideas is astounding. what's more, that a different bunch of sounds with pauses in different places can be totally intelligible to one group of people while remaining absolutely meaningless to another group of people.

this morning, i went to visit an elderly man i've known for a long time. we've always spoken in cantonese but that was never his strong dialect. so in the past, we never really spoke at all. but today was different. today, he could happily prattle off a list of places and things to see and tell me all sorts of wonderful stories, simply because i now understand his dialect.

what's more, after the visit, i asked my mom more about him and i learned that he has a most fascinating life story. this aged gentleman who now has wisps of hair and a wrinkled old face is actually a descendant of royalty. in his youth, he learned ballet with the world masters, (for those who know the ballet world, he actually met Margot Fonteyn!). he was friends with the leading artists of his age. when his homeland's political scene changed, however, he was forced into hiding. and i learned that the name i know him by is not even his real name.

and so, it turns out that this friendly, dear little man who calls me his "granddaughter" and never fails to let me leave his house empty handed, is actually a decendent of a king - with talent and a richer life story than i'll ever begin to appreciate.

makes me wonder, how many of the King's sons and daughters do i rub shoulders with and fail to recognize their worth?

i'm so glad God never has this problem!

...but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father."
~Romans 8:15~